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Archives For November 30, 1999

What she wants to be when she grows up

March 18, 2013

As my four-year old daughter and I lay in bed one evening, she started in on a litany of endless questions per her normal bedtime routine.

When will I get a husband? When will I be a mommy?

I instinctively launched into a series of sensible replies. You don’t need to worry about getting married until you are done with college. After college, you can find a job that you like and then maybe find a husband too. After you are married, you could become a mommy. And then I will be a grandma! (giggles…hers genuine, mine nervous)

A large part of me wanted to preach about not rushing into sharing her life with others. I want her to know what it’s like to get to know and love herself first.

But then I paused and thought about how awesome it is that she really wants to be a mom someday.

Heaven knows I am not the poster child for attentiveness. I work full-time, which means my children have other caregivers besides me that they rely upon. I write often so it’s not uncommon for them to see mom’s face buried in her laptop. I run on occasion so they’ve had to accept that exercise contributes to mom’s happiness.

However, I am also confident they know there isn’t anything I value more in life than them.

I’ve consciously chosen to put them first, over climbing the corporate ladder, ahead of my social life, and even before my husband when I think about it. Date nights get scheduled or they don’t happen in the midst of our kids’ activities.

cocktails by candlelight...errr...the glow of TVs

cocktails by candlelight…errr…the glow of TVs

The last drinks I shared with my spouse were more of a survival tactic than a pleasurable escape. We sipped them in between basketball games while eating dinner at a local sports bar. The romantic ambiance of blaring TVs was surpassed only by the chatter of overstimulated children.

The funny part is…I honestly wouldn’t want to live my life any other way.

That doesn’t mean I don’t want to check out every now and then, throw my hands up in the air, and auction them all off to the highest bidder.

It simply means that chaos feels comfortable.

Knowing that my little girl wants to follow in my footsteps is humbling to say the least. I have a feeling I will want to follow her lead too.

I just hope she doesn’t leave me in the dust as she heads off to conquer the world.

Created by Heidi Woodard

In Belonging, Family, Kids, Love, Memories , , , , , , ,
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Do not for one moment believe you are all alone

December 3, 2012

I don’t even know who I’m writing this post for.

All I know is that I can’t stop thinking about events that took place on Saturday and the 3-month old baby who no longer has a mom or a dad to love and protect her.

If you hadn’t already learned about the series of events, a Kansas City Chiefs linebacker fatally shot his girlfriend in front of his own mom, and then drove to a practice facility parking lot where he shot and killed himself in front of the football team’s coach and general manager.

That’s two lives removed from this earth far too early, who are now more recognized than they ever dreamed possible for entirely the wrong reasons.

I can’t stop thinking about an article my friend shared on Facebook about the short- and long-term effects that traumatic brain injury has on the lives of football players. Game Over is the most thorough and thought provoking piece of sports writing I’ve read this year. It’s hard to discredit the inextricable link between athletes who’ve routinely had their bells rung  and the mental aftershock they endure.

It’s hard to accept that my boys want to play football and that they are now old enough to play tackle football like their dad did.

This most recent tragedy makes me think about every person who decides to end their life because of hopelessness, confusion, and mental anguish.

photo (43)

I had an aunt who committed suicide. Without going into much detail, I was very young when she decided that life was too hard to live. I never really knew her. I wished I would have.

I’m confident I know people today who are struggling. Who are too proud or scared to admit how much they hurt.

A fear of mine is that they won’t reach out to someone before they reach for the gun, rope, or pill bottle.

It weighs heavily on my heart that so many hurt so much.

photo (42)

I’ve shared my top three uplifting songs before because I believe so strongly in the influence of music.

I also believe in the power of prayer/reflection and of finding peace in others. I believe that blogging is an outlet for many, including myself, to not only embrace but also to escape from the world in which we live.

Never do I diminish another person’s feelings nor judge a person who wrongly believes there is nothing left in them to give. If you are reading this and suffer a sense of despair, I beg you to consider those in your life who you impact everyday. Do not discredit their need to have YOU in their lives.

“Nothing could be worse than the fear that one had given up too soon, and left one unexpended effort that might have saved the world.” – Jane Addams

We all have something to give to this world, even when that something is unknown to ourselves. Don’t ever give up. You are not alone.

Created by Heidi Woodard

In Belonging, Reflection, Shame, Strength, Support , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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How to fearlessly experience a mission-driven life of service

November 26, 2012

“When we are fearlessly who we are, we don’t need external validation, just an opportunity to express ourselves, live fully, and serve the world.” – Arianna Huffington, Founder of the Huffington Post.

I read this quote, re-read it, paused to ponder, then compared it to another quote I stumbled upon from Aaron Levie, CEO at Box, Inc.:

“A great (company) mission will attract like-minded individuals that want to go on the same journey…Be on a mission that doesn’t suck.”

The combined essence of those two statements basically sum up how revitalized I felt following a trip I recently took for work.

I documented my leap of faith earlier this summer when I decided to finally leave my old job. I’m happy to say I’ve gone through the awkward and exciting acclimation period with a new company, new coworkers, and new mission.

I’m not sure if what I’m doing today will be the same job I’m doing 10 years down the road, but today, well today it simply feels right.

One week ago, I was sitting in a room full of marketing professionals and realized it was the first time in my professional career that I was surrounded by people who didn’t generally look or think like me. Even better…despite our variances…the notion of serving others over ourselves was a unifying belief we all held close to our hearts.

Near the end of a jam-packed multi-day session of strategy development and information sharing on how to help each other move our company forward, our group leader asked us to pause.

To close our eyes and place our hands at our sides.

To breathe deeply and imagine being in a room with family and friends.

To come to a startling realization that everyone around us in grieving deeply.

To imagine that our life has ended and we are watching our own funeral unfold before our very eyes.

To see the person we love most dearly attempt to collect themselves as they pull out a piece of paper to address the crowd.

To imagine the words we would want them to say to describe how we lived our lives.

Were we there for them? Or did we shove them behind other priorities like work, drugs, possessions, power, etc.? Did we use our life to build more than our bank account? Did we falsely assume there would always be time to not only achieve our own dreams, but also help others fulfill theirs?

This simple exercise forced me to think about my own mortality. I share it with you so that you may do the same.

Created by Heidi Woodard

In Awareness, Belonging, Inspiration, Reflection, Service, Support , , , , , , , , ,
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